hot take but i actively miss when tv shows were like 20 episodes a season. slow down. let me get to know the characters. let them do something dumb and not consequential to the plot for one fucking second i’m begging you.
Okay, so he’s got a girly face, and he wears tights and some high boots. Sure.
But check out that noble steed. That’s one ready-to-kick-ass-and-take-names steed.
While other princesses just run away and leave nothing, Philip gets AN INVITE TO HER HOUSE. He gets a song, a dance, and a first date.
He comes home, just to tell his dad he’s not going to marry the princess because he’s in love.
No. Other. Reason. He rides in and is just like, “I met the girl I’m going to marry. Now I’ve got a birthday party to be at. Bye Dad.”
Now how much do you think his dad weighs? That short fat little man? Probably pretty heavy.Not a problem for Prince Philip.
And then he gets jumped by goblins, both hands tied behind his back
But that’s not enough to stop Prince Philip.Oh no.
He breaks his hands free and starts chuckinggoblins.
Look at that face. That face. The “BITCH JUST YOU WAIT” face. He may be tied down by a dozen goblins but he’s not gonna take no shit from this witch.
In fact, he’s so strong, she ends up keeping him chained to the wall, but he still fights back.
Now when he finally does get free–
He’s ready to go into battle UNARMED. He don’t need no shield or sword, he’s going to go punch Maleficent’s face in with his fist. If Flora didn’t stop him, he probably would have, too.
Backed up against a cliff edge, nowhere to go. Fighting off goblins. But there’s so many and just one Philip.
NBD I’LL JUST JUMP AND SLIDE DOWN THE ROCK PILE IN MY SKIN-TIGHT TIGHTS.
Gate closing?
who gives a fuck? certainly not prince philip.
Lighting hitting rocks around me?
NBD BRO
Giant forest of thorns?
Bitch, get out of my way. I’ve got a princess to save.
Sheer cliff face? Fire burning behind me? Back to a wall?
Calm down guys, I got this.
I’LL JUST FUCKING SCALE IT ONE-HANDED.
And fight the bloody beast from 500 feet high, with literally nothing to save me if I fall.
Lose the shield off the cliff?
JUST STAND THERE AND SMILE ‘CAUSE I’VE GOT A FUCKING MAGIC SWORD THAT’S GOING THROUGH YOUR HEART BITCH.
Just chuck it. Straight through.
Then jump out of the way…
And survive. That’s what happens to bitches who mess with the woman I love.
Get the horse.
Get the girl.
EXPLAIN NOTHING.
that’s how he EARNED his happily ever after.
Srsly. The most bad. ass. prince. disney ever wrote.
I 1,000% never thought of it from this point of view before and am now screaming Too Hot, Hot Damn, Made that dragon wanna retire man.
“EXPLAIN NOTHING”
Not only is every bit of this true, but don’t forget that he also changes clothes between breaking the curse and taking Aurora downstairs to meet the fam. Like, what? When? Where? But we don’t need to ask why; we know. Dude is aware a costume-change is called for, he’s gotta go look his best, so he, just, y’know. Changes costume.
(shrug) Some of us rise to meet Archetype. Some of us rise higher. :)
benoit blanc living across from a retired nate and sophie and instantly having beef with nate. they keep inviting each other over for dinner (sophie and phillip get along fabulously) and dinner keeps turning into a furious battle of wills as nate and benoit argue over courts of law, and more importantly what to do when such systems fail individuals. sophie and phillip blithely continue discussing what broadway production they might catch next over the sound of two brilliant minds whirring at 200 miles an hour
nate and sophie insist they dont have any children, but at irregular times of year and any hour of the night, they are visited by three young people. benoit manages to waylay the one named ‘hardison’ by the lifts, once; phillip catches 'eliot’ out in the hallway grumpily fixing the doorbell to nate and sophie’s apartment a few months later. the third, however, they’ve only ever glimpsed as a flash of a high ponytail, or squeezed between the other two, blocking her lithe frame from view.
(some nights they hear a yip of delight followed by a metallic zzzip going straight down past their windows, but that probably has nothing to do with anything)
sometimes, after cases that dont mete out the justice benoit knows the world deserves, or when a rich asshole has enough money and power up their sleeves to get away, despite it all, nate and sophie like to come by with dessert and sherry, and stay later than usual, until the whole affair entire is unravelled. a few weeks, sometimes months later, the inevitable happens - the rich asshole’s web of lies pulls taut, exposing them to the authorities and the world in an almost ridiculous set of circumstances.
benoit likes to think of it as divine justice. phillip has his own suspicions.
I’m loving this new trend of people going to zoos and participating in animal enrichment. We use to observe large exotic animals for our entertainment, but the fact is that we are now trying to make ourselves equally as entertaining for them. It’s interactive, completely parpicipatory and I would argue that eventually someone’s gonna come up with something new enough that it expland ethologists understanding about how some animals think, problem solve, communicate and feel and I think its fantastic.
Human: play?
Aquatic creature from an entirely different branch of the animal tree: play!
Random thoughts, my story snippets when I do write, and sharing things I do like. I seriously doubt anyone will follow this, but it'd be nice if they did.
